Carol Bayer Sager (you know, the songwriter*) and AlAnon – in the same blog. It turns out she’s been going to meetings for years — and in this post on fearlessness she describes how it has helped her deal with the fears and phobias that emerged from her tough childhood.
As she quotes the slogans and lessons of this amazing organization, I recognize the power of this support program for those with alcoholics or addicts in their lives. It IS about fearlessness, and about ending the ridiculous urge to control everything — mostly to keep things safe because so much of life with an addict is so chaotic. If the program were not described as one "of attraction, not promotion" I would write lots more about it but respect for the privacy of others and the effectiveness of the low key love and fellowship the program offers demonstrate the wisdom of this non-evangelizing attitude.
Anyone who knows Jenn Satterwaite’s amazing Mommy Needs Coffee knows the power of addiction and of 12 step programs; I’m sure there are dozens of similar blogs that I don’t know about. It’s so funny, too, because so often I’ll see people acting the way that I used to (and still do, in moments of "relapse") and think "boy, they should go to a meeting." Of course, it only works if you choose it on your own – but when it works – boy does it work.
This paragraph is being written later – I actually just came from a meeting. It always amazes me how much pain is gathered in the room of an AlAnon meeting – and how much help people are to one another just be being there. I am a bit shy about writing in specifics but I’m all with Carol Bayer S – It’s a real gift.
*Songs by Carol Bayer Sager include: Blueberry Pie", "My One True Friend Don’t Cry Out Loud, Through the Eyes of Love, Nobody Does It Better That’s What Friends Are For, It’s My Turn