Women Bloggers Are NOT Cute Little Girls: Tell the New York Times

BH Cool Moms 2

What is it about women who blog that scares so many people – even other women —
even the New York Times?  Once again this time, they’ve decided to offer an “analysis” or a “portrait” or an I don’t know what
about bloggers who are women and moms.  And when they do, they write with
a condescending, bemused attitude that is what I remember from the early days
of the women’s movement, when men would joke about our desire to open our own
doors, earn our own livings, make our own decisions.  It was kind of cute
to want to be able to get credit cards without a husband’s permission, to cover
a story without having to go up in the balcony, to keep our names when we got
married.   Feminism was just so adorable.

Now, we’re free on so many levels, and one manifestation of that freedom is the
vibrant world we’ve created online.  Sisterhoods that cross race and
politics and religion and age as we share ideas and pain, joy and pride, birth
and loss and every other story that is part of living a life.   There have
been a couple of wonderful responses to this irritating TIMES piece (and it’s
not the first…)  One of my own favorites, Mom-101,
whose admirers are legion, wrote

“…once you
get past the first half of the article, there’s actually some solid information
in there….But I wish [all] that had been to focus of an article about my
favorite blogging community that just made the front page of my favorite
section of my favorite Sunday paper.  I wish it had opened with the yearning
of bloggers for the community to return to good writing, and the evidence that
in the end, that’s mostly what pays off….  

Of course, there
are more.  My friend Danielle Wiley, known to many of her friends as Foodmomiac but also an executive at Edelman PR, has also weighed in.

I invite you to read the full piece and form your own opinions, but sentences like “bringing
together participants for some real-time girly bonding” might very well stop
you in your tracks. As I write this, my husband (and fellow Edelman executive
Michael Wiley) is at SXSW. Would Mendelsohn classify that experience as macho
bonding? Or would she write that he is attending a conference for the purposes
of education and networking? Why do people, including Ms. Mendlesohn, continue
to refer to networking among women as girly bonding? I seriously doubt the
participants at Bloggy Boot Camp were wearing jammies and braiding each other’s
hair. However, from the tenor of the piece, it was pretty easy to jump to that
conclusion.

Here’s the bottom line:  I’m old enough to be the mother of both of these women
and many of their peers yet they have welcomed me as a sister – a blogger and a
friend.  They’ve honored the sappy posts I’ve written about my sons
and my marriage and they’ve shared ideas and advice in comments, in twitter and even in real life.

They and their compatriots are talented, compassionate,
ornery pioneers
who have built what I think of as the new quilting bee, the new Red Tent where they share the wisdom and mysteries that are women’s lives.  And they do much more – just go check out the list in Liz’s post.  Not for one moment are they
silly or unaware or careless or trivial.  And to gain a few points with
silly headlines and denigrating phrases isn’t bad taste, it’s also bad
journalism.  Go see for yourself.

Womanomics Hits Home – Punditmom’s Home, That Is

Shipman Kay I had the privilege this morning of attending a book party at the home of the one and only Punditmom, whose talents are exceeded only by her very lovely self. 

The event had real star power:  BBC's Katty Kay and ABC's Claire Shipman, both solid, unpretentious, smart, thoughtful women – and moms – and, oh yeah, network news stars.  Unless you've been living under a rock, you probably know that they've written a book called Womanomics, whose basic thesis is that it makes economic and corporate governance sense for the needs of women workers to be accommodated by their employers.  In fact, if their book is right, and there is no reason to doubt it, there is a real revolution afoot.

For someone my age, it's thrilling to hear employment issues discussed with assumptions we could never have made.  Asking for schedule adjustments, work/family life balance, was out of the question.  We were just fighting for equal pay and a few weeks off when we had our babies.   The argument these two women make, that businesses are learning that women in their workforce in great numbers, and at all levels, is of great value to their bottom line.  They line up to hear the two speak; join conference calls by the dozens to be briefed and basically finally get the power and capacity of "more than half the talent, not just more than half the population."  Interesting, accessible and funny, great believers in their mission, they were a pleasure to meet and listen to.  I can't wait to read the book.

OH and I'll post about The Wedding soon.

IS THIS THE COUNTRY WE WANT? SARAH PALIN’S CRUEL ADDRESS

Before I say anything else, I want to show you this great response to Gov. Palin.  Take the time to watch it.

I started this post last night but waited to post it until I cooled off and now I’m glad, because there are so many thoughtful responses from people who have gone beyond the rage I have been feeling.  The first is the above video response from Nerdette.  For some reason the mocking of community organizers was particularly painful to me.  Of course since I’ve been listening to The People Have the Power  for days now I guess that’s not a surprise.

I also recommend. thanks to a tweet from Pundit Mom, the ever-wise Gloria Steinem’s response in the Los Angeles Times, which includes this: It
won’t work. This isn’t the first time a boss has picked an unqualified
woman just because she agrees with him and opposes everything most
other women want and need. Feminism has never been about getting a job
for one woman. It’s about making life more fair for women everywhere.
It’s not about a piece of the existing pie; there are too many of us
for that. It’s about baking a new pie.

Selecting Sarah Palin, who was touted all summer
by Rush Limbaugh, is no way to attract most women, including die-hard
Clinton supporters. Palin shares nothing but a chromosome with Clinton.
Her down-home, divisive and deceptive speech did nothing to cosmeticize
a Republican convention that has more than twice as many male delegates
as female, a presidential candidate who is owned and operated by the
right wing and a platform that opposes pretty much everything Clinton’s
candidacy stood for — and that Barack Obama’s still does. To vote in
protest for McCain/Palin would be like saying, "Somebody stole my
shoes, so I’ll amputate my legs."

My good friend Mocha Momma offers some very personal yet universal and policy-based observations – YES you can be personal – as SP was – and still think about policy — as Mocha did.  Here’s a sample but go read the whole thing.  She’s a wonderful person and educator whose commitment to schools in underserved neighborhoods is profound. She scoffed at Obama’s community organizing and pushed for her own
small town agenda. You know what I heard in that thinly veiled line?
Her lack of experience with people of color and the power of community
organization. She doesn’t know cities or poverty that way or even what
that does for education. She is keeping that dividing line bold and
prominent by letting me see what she thinks about that: small town =
hard-working white farming families vs. city/community = blacks and
latinos and asians and other people she knows nothing about.
She so wasn’t talking to me.

More from a Daily Kos-ite, noted by Soapbox Mom or try this one if you just want a laugh.

OK I can’t hide any longer.  Here’s me talking.  I’ve been around a lot of political campaigns and presidencies.  I remember Spiro Agnew and his vicious attacks on the press — many other Republican "red meat" speeches and Democratic ones too.  But I don’t remember anything like this (except Pat Buchanan in 1992 but that was different.)  Cruelty, sarcasm, disguised bigotry, language so beyond the appropriate, in my view, that it was breathtaking.  Literally. 

In Mocha Momma’s post there’s a link to a New York Times piece on Palin’s time as mayor of Wasilla.   Here’s a taste:

Shortly
after becoming mayor, former city officials and Wasilla residents said,
Ms. Palin approached the town librarian about the possibility of
banning some books, though she never followed through and it was
unclear which books or passages were in question.

Ann Kilkenny, a
Democrat who said she attended every City Council meeting in Ms.
Palin’s first year in office, said Ms. Palin brought up the idea of
banning some books at one meeting.
“They were somehow morally or
socially objectionable to her,” Ms. Kilkenny said.

The librarian,
Mary Ellen Emmons, pledged to “resist all efforts at censorship,” Ms.
Kilkenny recalled. Ms. Palin fired Ms. Emmons shortly after taking
office but changed course after residents made a strong show of
support.
Ms. Emmons, who left her job and Wasilla a couple of years
later, declined to comment for this article.

If you have read Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale, you’ve seen a society in which these values  were completely in control.  Not only government control of women’s bodies but a government of rage,  male-domination and the absence of liberty.  Of course not even these folks can take us that far but every time we get into one of these periods it’s all I can think about.

Someone on Twitter last night wrote:  When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross." Sinclair Lewis

OK.  So that’s why this song says so much.  It has to.

NEW FRIENDS ON MY OLD TURF: MOMMY BLOGGERS VISIT KATIE AT CBS NEWS

Katie_shakes_hands
What are the odds?  I spent what would have been my prime mommy-blogging years, before the Interweb was anyone’s darling, working at CBS News at 524 West 57th St.  Now, some of my sweet, funny mommy blogging friends went through the same door I used every day for 7 years to meet with Katie Couric.  Here’s what happened:

Pretty cool, huh?  My 9 years at TODAY never crossed with Katie and clearly my CBS years were the "Place to Be" years, well before hers but it sure was fun to see the girlfriends sashay on in and charm her to pieces.  But then, that’s what they do.

Blogger roll call for The Visit – drawn from original host SV(Silicon Valley) Moms: