This week our Blogging Boomers carnival makes its way to Fabulous After Forty – and fabulous it is: earthquakes, divorces, the bossy AARP, marriage, the Paycheck Fairness Act and more – and all in one place! Take a look.
Category: Baby Boom
BlogHer, Bella, Books and Us Women
Two weeks ago I spent the weekend with 1,000 remarkable women. You know where; the Web has been full of posts and tweets and messages about BlogHer, the women bloggers conference. Since its founding, BlogHer has held four conferences, and I’ve been to three of them. For those three years I’ve wondered at the strength and power of both the gathering and each woman, most far younger than I, who is part of it. Audacious and rambunctious, honest and gifted, they are far beyond where I was at their age. I’ve always known that all of us, sisters from the 70’s and 80’s and 90’s, scratched and kicked and pulled and fought to move our lives, and those of the women around us, forward. In many ways, we made a difference. I’m proud of that.
Today though I was reminded of a real heroine, one whose star lit the way for much of what we did, in a wonderful piece in The Women’s Review of Books: Ruth Rosen‘s review of Bella Abzug: How One Tough Broad from the Bronx Fought
Jim Crow and Joe McCarthy, Pissed Off Jimmy Carter, Battled for the
Rights of Women and Workers, … Planet, and Shook Up Politics Along
the Way–an oral history of the life of Bella Abzug. Among other things, Ruth says:
She fought for the
rights of union workers and African Americans, protested the use of the atomic
bomb and the Vietnam War, waged endless battles to advance women’s rights, and
spent the last years of her life promoting environmentalism and human rights.
When she plunged into the women’s movement during the late 1960s, Abzug infused
feminism with her fierce, strategic, take-no-prisoners spirit. As Geraldine
Ferraro reminds us,
She didn’t knock lightly on the door. She didn’t even push it open or batter it
down. She took it off the hinges forever! So that those of us who came after
could walk through!
And with a bow to Bella and so many others, walk through we have. It’s tough to pass the stories ‘I walked six miles to school in the snow’
fogey. Younger women, though, would find courage to fight their own
battles in Bella’s story and in many of our own."
For me, Bella was a brave, untamed beacon of defiance and energy. Her story, and ours, laid the ground for these determined, gifted "blogger generation" women. I would so love to be able to tell them about her – and about all of us, just so they could know the solidarity, the battles, the anger and the hope. And why seeing them all together, hugging, laughing and raising hell, makes me so damned happy. And that Bella would have loved them.
BloggingBoomers Carnival #78
Divorce, marriage, coffee, retirement — you name it and, this week, it’s probably floating around someplace among the posts at Blogging Boomers Carnival #78. See for yourself.
THEY WILL CAMPAIGN AGAINST US UNTIL WE’RE ALL DEAD – AND MAYBE AFTER
From the day Richard Nixon was nominated in 1968 until Tuesday afternoon, forty years later, when John McCain began running this “Love” commercial, Republicans have been running against us. All of us who share a history of opposing the Vietnam war and working to elect an anti-war president. Against everything we ever were, believed, dreamed, voted for, marched against, volunteered to change, spoke about, created, sang, wrote, painted, sculpted or said to one another on the subway or the campus or anyplace else from preschool parent nights to Seders to the line at the supermarket.
How is it possible that what we tried to do is still the last best hope to elect a Republican? They used it against John Kerry. They used it against Max Cleland. They did it every time (well, almost) they were losing policy battles in the Clinton years. They called CSPAN and said unspeakable things. And now they are using the history of people my side of sixty to run against a man who was, if my math is right, seven years old during this notorious “summer of love” which – I might add, had nothing to do with those of us working to end the war. In fact, there were two strands of rebellion in those years. The Summer of Love/ Woodstock folks and the political, anti-war activists.
At the 1967 National Student Association Convention in Maryland, I saw a room full of students boo Timothy Leary off the stage, literally. We didn’t want to “turn on, tune in, drop out” we wanted to organize against the war. The anti-war movement was not a party. I know that’s not a bulletin but it is so hard to see all of us reduced to a single mistaken stereotype. Those who chose to find a personal solution weren’t nuts; communes and home-made bread were a lot more immediate gratification than march after march, teach-in after teach-in, speech after speech. “If you’re goin’ to San Francisco, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair.” Tempting, romantic – and not us.
Even more painful is the fact that the cultural and political divide is still so intense that research (I assume) told the McCain guys that this commercial would work. That our patriotic, committed efforts to change our country’s path, and the cultural alienation that drove others toward the streets of San Francisco, combine to become a stronger motivator than all the desperate issues we face today, this side of those 40 years. Perhaps even worse, these Bush years have dismantled so many of the successes we did have, so that in addition to facing, yet again, this smear against the activism of 1968 (and I repeat, that was forty years ago — longer than most of the bloggers I know have been alive) there’s the awareness of what we did that has been undone.
I need to say here that I grew up on the shores of the Monongehela River in Pittsburgh and my classmates were kids who mostly went into the steel mills or the Army after high school. I knew plenty of supporters of the war. I went to prom and hung out at the Dairy Queen with them. But it never occurred to me to demonize them, to hold against them their definition of patriotism.
I’m not writing off or looking down upon those who did support the war; I’m saying that this cynical, craven abuse of the devotion of people on both sides to the future of their country is reprehensible and precisely the kind of behavior that has broken the hearts of so many Americans, on those both sides of the political spectrum, who just want their candidates to lead us in hope for what our country can be, not defame others whose dreams aren’t quite the same as theirs.
BLOGGING BABY BOOMERS CARNIVAL #77 : Holiday Inns, Senior Moments and the Movies
Well I’m "it" this week –
the blog carnival gang has landed on my doorstep, and what wonderful gifts
they’ve left!
Since we’re blogging boomers we’ll
start with John Agno of So Baby Boomer, who’s thinking about video games this
week: Aging boomers are turning to video games to keep their wits
agile….because they are worried about too many senior moments.
The always original Wesley Hein
reminds us that "Hollywood has made good use of the struggles of middle
age." With that in mind, on LifeTwo he has compiled a list of Top Ten Midlife Crisis Movies.
Rhea Pearlman of The (recently highly complimented) Boomer Chronicles is thinking real estate and makes an irritating discovery: There’s a stigma to being middle-aged and renting.
On the aging theme, Nora Ephron may hate her neck, but she never met the two creators of Fabulous over Forty. Did you know that wearing the
wrong style of necklace can really age you? They’ll tell you which of this
season’s accessories are in or out.
Perfect for summer: I Remember JFK‘s Ron Enderland’s
meditations on summer vacations past : "Ah, life on the
road circa 1967. Where would we spend the night? Would dad pull an all-nighter
and get us somewhere early in the morning? That was known to happen. Or would
we stay at a nice, clean, cheap, joyless motel without a pool? Or, would
dad, feeling flush after a particularly profitable week fixing diesel trucks in
his garage, spring for the ultimate experience in lodging? That would, of
course, be the Holiday Inn!"
In other very exciting news, the ultra-cool, innovative, trend watching company PSFK has listed
Gen Plus and The Boomer Chronicles in their list of “Boomer Blogs to
Follow”. Janet Wendy has the full list posted and a link to PSFK to get a
peek at the latest in trend.
couldn’t help smiling in recognition when she read Autobiography in Five Short Chapters by Portia
Nelson. See if it rings any bells for you.
Meanwhile, Midlife Crisis Queen asks
"Do you ever wonder if you’re headed for a midlife crisis?" then
answers with the warning signs.
things get rough?" asks Dina. "There may be a better way to solve things." She’s got some thoughts over at This Marriage Thing.
And, even though it’s just below here – here’s my cranky Boomer post about the John McCain "love" commercial. Don’t hate me if you disagree – I couldn’t help it.
BLOGGING BOOMERS CARNIVAL 75 – I’M LATE POSTING
My bad. In the frantic two weeks that I’ve had, I, for the first time(s) neglected to post the weekly carnival location – which is a loss for everyone since the posts are always so great. This week you’ll find wonderful meditations on road trips, penny candies, in-laws and the Beatles, among others.
OH — and last week’s was at MidLife Crisis Queen, from Roone Arledge to pensions to packing for vacation. Make an honest woman of me and take a look, will you? Sorry compadres; never again!
HIGH FIDELITY – A LITTLE BIT OF EACH OF US – IF WE’RE LUCKY
Do you remember High Fidelity? We woke up early this morning and it was on Showtime. I’d forgotten how wonderful it is, especially if you remember being 28ish, love John Cusack and wonderful witty writing or just plain love music. Like Cusack’s character, I annoy those who love me with at least one song – and often a Top Five — to go with whatever is going on at the time. A friend and I throw songs back and forth all the time; his wife and my husband are, usually, tolerant. So the initial connection is there. But what is it about this film that is so irresistible? Here’s a scene from YouTube:
There’s been a lot of sadness in my life lately, and a lot of anxiety. All the grown-up stuff that High Fidelity’s hero is fighting desperately to avoid. So it was sweet and moving, my husband and I slightly drowsy, just waking up and holding hands, to watch as he struggled to get where he needed to go. The things he says here are all true as me makes his way from the thrill of the new to the warmth and deep meaning of lasting a relationship.
Married since 1971, we’ve been through plenty – personal, medical, parental, political, spiritual and even musical. There were many times when one or the other of us despaired of getting through it. A huge issue haunts us even now. But was what so nice, at this point in our lives was watching this very funny, sweet (and I know, made-up – but still..) young man understand, finally, how much more joyous it is to build a life with someone than "to jump from rock to rock for the rest of my life until there aren’t any rocks left." It was a reminder, in the midst of yet another crisis, of the wonder and power of a life built together, no matter what obstacles may rise up along the way,
BLOGGING BOOMERS CARNIVAL, WEEK 73, WITH ITS USUAL INTERESTING MIX OF IDEAS
Blogging boomers are back, this week at our new friend at Dina at This Marriage Thing, a little late this week due to some technical stuff but here nonetheless. Take a look for posts on workforce aging, Karen Allen, attorney advertising and more.
FORTY YEARS AGO IN 1968: BOBBY KENNEDY AND WHAT CAME AFTER
By the time Robert Kennedy decided to run for President, in March of 1968, just days after Eugene McCarthy’s great New Hampshire primary showing demonstrated President Lyndon Johnson’s weakness and the real unpopularity of the Vietnam war, I was already neck-deep in McCarthy’s campaign. I’d been involved since the summer before, in what, before McCarthy agreed to run, we called Dump Johnson. When Allard Lowenstein (himself assassinated in 2000), recruited us for it at the 1967 National Student Association (NSA) meeting, he’d say "You can’t beat somebody (LBJ) with nobody." So he had worked very hard to get Bobby to run, but he refused.
It was Gene McCarthy who agreed to stand for all of us against the Johnson administration and the war. After NSA I organized the Smith campus. We were among the first students to go each weekend to New Hampshire to work for McCarthy and against the war. So when Kennedy announced, just days after our great New Hampshire triumph, that he would also run, we were devastated, and angry.
Over the months of campaigning though, I came to have enormous respect for Senator Kennedy and his campaign. There was no way to watch him without feeling the power of his connection with all kinds of Americans and his compassion, poetry and sense of justice. This moment, just as an inner city Indianapolis neighborhood learned of the death of Martin Luther King, is typical of him at his best:
By June the campaign was tense; such an important issue and the two Senators were running against one another as well as (and sometimes, it seemed, instead of) the war. Kennedy won Indiana. McCarthy won Oregon. We moved south to Los Angeles(one of many places I saw for the first time from a campaign bus) criss-crossing the state from Chico to San Francisco and back to LA. Just before the midnight after the primary, as June 4, 1968, election day, became June 5, we knew we’d lost, so we went to Senator’s concession in the ballroom of the Beverly Hilton and then back upstairs to mourn. We weren’t even watching the rest of coverage. Suddenly, running through the halls of the staff floor of the hotel, one of McCarthy’s closest advisors shouted "Turn on the TV! They’ve done it again!"
Continue reading FORTY YEARS AGO IN 1968: BOBBY KENNEDY AND WHAT CAME AFTER
WEDDINGS, INDY, CARRIE BRADSHAW AND ME (SPOILER ALERT – BIG HINTS ABOUT SATC ENDING)
I went to see Sex and the City tonight with a group of women in their 20’s, much younger than Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte or Miranda. I’m older than all of them. They liked it, thought it was disorganized, or OK, or so-so or good. I loved it.
As I tried to explain why, I got strangely emotional, struggling to describe how Samantha’s 50th birthday, the remarkable relationship shared by these four friends, the happy endings and the fairy tale aura, just made me happy. It’s tough to measure the impact of experience on a life perspective, or the different perspective of those just beginning to accumulate those experiences; good friends who are young adults newly married or newly parents – still far from my place as the mother of grown sons.
This, the film’s opening weekend, saw it push Indiana Jones out of first place. I’ve complained a great deal about the latest Indy movie. My husband emailed our older son that the movie "sucked." He responded that he had loved, it, that it was just "one big comic book." Clearly, he felt the same way I’d felt about the girls of Sex and the City. As he put it, with his usual wisdom "I guess everything is a matter of perspective."